Did you ever have a word of the day when you were in elementary school? You had to make up as many sentences as you could with the word and if it had more than one meaning then you had to be sure to use all the meanings as well. Today's word of the day for me is change. Last night I was looking at TV and a commercial came on for a Joyce Meyer program that was airing today. She was talking about several things that were appropriate for my life at this moment. The sound bite that I heard had to do with suffering the consequences of our actions and that sometimes God lets us go through suffering the consequences so we won't do the action again. This resonated with me all night, so much so that it took extra time to get to sleep. But the lesson that I was about to hear this morning was already taking root inside me. So this morning I woke up and waited for the program to come on. I really enjoy Joyce's no nonsense style of teaching and have read several of her books. So I settled on the couch as listened as she proceeded with this week's message on change. She said some things that I was not necessarily ready to hear because I wasn't ready to be honest with myself about them. She said that change is not about changing other people or even looking up to the heavens to cry for God to help us and change our lives. Change begins with when we decide to change. We have to make a decision to change the things that are in our power to change and trust the Lord to take care of the rest. He has already given us everything that we need but we are not always ready to receive it. So we get pitiful and try to have everyone give us a pat on the head or coddle us because we feel we deserve. Often times God is waiting on us when we think we are waiting on Him. So if we would just get up and do something or work in the capacities that we do have rather than focusing on the ones we don't then we might see the changes that we seek. We look everywhere else but within to seek change. We want everyone else to change and we don't try to search for the change that we need within. It's funny that we are often seeking things that we already have. Maybe we don't have what we want or the things that we have aren't exactly the way we want them but that doesn't mean that we can't move from where we are spiritually, physically, mentally, or emotionally and invoke changes that can help us to get to where we want to be. If you can't get out of the situation you're in then you can adopt a new attitude to make it work for you. If there are people that you have to be around that you don't like or don't like you you can look for a different situation and different people to be around. But whatever you do you don't have to be stuck or stay stuck where you are especially if where you are is making you unhappy. I was completely in agreement with this. Anyone who has read this blog before knows that there is more than one pitiful blog entry that laments the time it's taking for my life to get where I want it to be and all the pitfalls of having to deal with job hunting and relocating. But what I realized this morning is that if I didn't want change I would not have moved to New Jersey. If I didn't want change I would have given up on looking for a job after I lost my last opportunity at the Smithsonian. But if the past months have proven anything it's that I really do want to have a change in my situation and I am going to keep going until I reach the appointed time for what I want. But in the time that I am waiting for that to happen I can still have a good attitude, I can help out people when I can, I can volunteer in my community or at my church, and I can reach out to my friends and family. There are a lot of things that I can do even if they seem simple, they might mean something to someone else. If that wasn't enough after I finished reading my Bible for study this morning I read a chapter from Stan Toler's book and the chapter was about change. Stan hit on some of the points that Joyce hit on but he was talking more about being motivated to change and things that motivate us to change. We can be motivated positively or negatively, which lead to different kinds of changes in out lives. If we want to make a change to follow God and to receive His blessings it will require us to put Him first in our lives and to remember that even to change we need his help. Stan spoke of Jacob and how his name meant heel grabber or deceiver. He had left his home and his family because he deceived his brother out of his birthright. When Jacob was returning he wrestled with God in the night and wouldn't let go until God blessed him. God changed his name to Israel, which means He who struggles with God or Prince of God. He was changed by his new name, his new covenant with God, and by the limp that he was left with when God touched his hip. Everyday of his life Jacob was reminded of his wrestling with God by the physical effect it had on him but he was also committed to serving God and reminded of that as well. God helps us become who we need to be through change. Change is scary and unsettling especially when it happens in a short period of time but embracing it can work out for our good and bring us to a place we might have not reached if we had remained settled or too afraid to move.
So I don't think that the change lessons that I learned today were a coincidence. There has been a lot of change going on in my life and I haven't really had a prescription for how to deal with it all. And I have gone through all this emotional roller coaster feelings and stages and I have extreme highs and extreme lows. It's added much stress to my life, robbed me of sleep and has tried to stamp out my confidence. But I keep rising above and the key is to stay above. You have to determine that no matter what the circumstances are that you will not focus on the situations and how you feel but know that you will make it through because God says you will if you trust and believe in Him. It can look like nothing is happening and that all the resources have disappeared, all the friends are gone, and there is nothing to do but sit and mourn the things you've lost and the things you wish you had. Or you can believe that things are happening that you can't see and at the exact moment that you need for things to work in your favor they will because you trusted the Lord and you walked in faith and stayed the course even when the times get rough. I want to be the person that made it and I want to be the person who overcame not the one who got beaten down and couldn't make it.
"Everyone thinks of changing the world but no one thinks of changing himself"
- Leo Tolstoy
"Be the change you want to see in the world." - Mahatma Gandhi
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